My family dosen't agree with my 2nd Amendment right?? WTF?

[NYMetsFan86 9]

ditto....NjJoni just posted that article. This first testament quote i guess seems fitting to osb's recent comment...

 

 

“If a man comes to kill you,

rise early and kill him first”

(Talmud, Berakoth 58b).

 

not sure why i just like it.....its simple

[Hooligan 0]

In my experience with antis that are close to me, (family, friends, co-workers) not bringing up the issue myself has gone a long way. Once they found out I was "a gun person," what seemed to have the most impact from then on was that yes, I owned guns, I wasn't a crazy asshat like their pre-conceived notions of "gun people". I answer questions if they come up, I talk about it if they start the convo, but I don't try to force anything on them or use any opening I can find to start a debate. I've had some good, civil debates on 2A that were very productive... when they were open to having a chat.

 

IMHO, looking for any opportunity to jump on an anti for their beliefs and backing them into a corner can do more harm than good.

[NYMetsFan86 9]

that seems like a good stance to have. great advice thanks

[SuRrEaLNJ 294]

despite having first shot at the age of 5 or so with a .22 revolver and shot here and there over the last 6 years or so when out with friends my own personal gun journey started last year

 

my fiance was against, then hesitant, now she shoots the pants off of me. i explained to her i wanted to defend us and our home, we took classes together, and it took off from there. she bought herself a Springfield 1911

 

my father always used to shoot, stopped years (decades) ago, i got him back into it big time

 

my mother is anti, but bought me and my fiance a case of .45 over xmas, ive gotten her as far as handling unloaded weapons

 

Ive taken wifeys brother a few times as well as one of his friends out

 

my future father in law has asked to go, but we havent had compatible schedules.

 

her mother still is bitter about it i think, but shes like that.

 

at this point everyone knows where i stand. i dont bring it up untill it comes up generally. on one side of the family i have a few uncles that are swaying in the direction, ones picked up a few handguns the other is working on swaying his wife. its not worth causing a rift between family members, but if you stay the corse eventually some of them atleast will come around, and a few will wake up

[ryan_j 0]

Well most of my family doesn't really delve into my love of firearms. It's my business and not theirs.

 

They are immigrants, and support democrats. My mom supports hillary because she wants a woman president. My mom supported Obama because she likes Obama. 

 

She knows zero about the issues, sorry to say.

 

So I don't even bother with talking to them. 

 

When I go to visit her in Florida I'll probably stay in a hotel anyway because she doesn't get along with my wife. Of course since I have a Florida permit I can CCW to my heart's content. 

[mikeyboyeee 66]

Sux that it got to that point. I'll be avoiding that level of argument at all costs. We've already had a rocky dinner discussion last week that ended with my mom refusing that shooting is a hobby. As everyone stated previously it seems to come down to being educated about the subject. However, all of our families are different and we all get different reactions/responses.

 

Thanks for posting Mikey, i can relate

It gets worse. I have a very liberal, quasi socialist GF who is also anti gun, BUT grew up in a VERY pro Gun family (her cousins would exchange guns and weapons for xmas every year) and her dad is extremely pro 2a and has MANY!

 

She understands why I want them and doesnt give me grief anymore about them.  I have been slowly educating her about them and she is willing to go to range with me (her father had her shoot at a very young age, just isnt into it).

 

My father sort of understands now at least my desire to own one.  he hates them and wont go to range with me ( no matter how many times I ask), but as a Jew, he understands the need for an armed populace and is against ANY gun grab what so ever, realizing, the 1stthing Hitler did was to disarm the Jews..

 

He has a very close friend who is a hunter and VERY VERY Pro 2a, so he educates my pops a bit on it and I think that helped change his mind on a lot of the issues (of course he would never listen to me

 

 

My stepmother is a lost cause.

 

She asked who was I that I should own a gun?

I said an American Citizen with no criminal record what so ever who has the inelianble right to own them as provided to me in the Constitution of the United States.

She then told me well, the constitution needs to be changed.

That's when I laughed at her and said good luck with that!

 

Bottom line- It is your life, your money. You're a big boy, so don't let family detractors deter you from your rights!

[NYMetsFan86 9]

wow Mikey, the thing that wowed me the most was your stepmothers comments. That would piss me off you handled it well. 

[PDM 91]

If someone is strongly anti-gun ownership you probably won't be able to change their mind.  90% of the issue is emotional/ethical/moral, not rational/logical.  Many people simplistically view the issue as:  guns are designed to kill, guns are bad, you don't need one.  My advice is not to discuss it with them, and if you do take a low-key approach.

 

Whatever you do, get as much training as you possibly can.  The best place to do that in NJ, IMO, is Gunforhire, but there are other places throughout the state.  Take basic pistol and then take as many intermediate and advanced classes as possible.  You will be safer and you'll enjoy shooting recreationally much more.

[AlDente67 563]

Most people can't understand why someone would want to buy something designed to kill or produce major injury. For most of us, that is the exact reason we want it, to be able to kill or produce major injury in the event we have to protect our families or selves.

 

Most opposite sides look at the worst case scenarios.

 

"You'll get shot with it / Someone will use it against you"

"You'll shoot yourself with it"

"R U TERRORIST?"

"Your daughter will find it"(I have a daughter too)

 

The list goes on.

 

 

My viewpoint on having a firearm at home changed drastically after seeing "Law Abiding Citizen". The home invasion scene was enough to make me start this process. I previously thought having a bat and knives laying around the house was enough.. NOPE.

 

I will be having this same discussion with my wife once all my paperwork goes through, she's very anti-gun and not very happy that I am doing this..But she doesn't really have a choice in the matter. A little education on firearm safety and shooting will go a long way..she may not "LIKE" it..but she'll know how to use once and safety check it.

Same here.

 

For 20 years, my wife was a firm NO with no further debate allowed.  Then her mother went about cleaning out her father's things after he passed away, and lo and behold, he had 3 pistols hidden away for decades.  They were all aghast.

Then, election night 2012, I said to the wife that I don't care what she thinks, I'm applying.  She didn't balk.  Thanks Obama!

 

Now I have several rifles, shotguns, and pistols in the collection.  She doesn't care if she doesn't see them.  But the thought process (honed over 40 years) is still lingering.  She realized over time that the scary black weapons don't actually crawl around at night and self-fire.

Ironically, the kids (teenagers) have been indoctrinated at school to be antis, yet they love to fire up Call of Duty and rack up kills after school.

[MartyZ 692]

I guess I am one of the lucky ones as far as family goes. My grandparents where jews in the soviet union diring WWII so my entire family understands the importance of guns. I do have a lot of close friends who hate guns, and I am slowly converting them one at a time, 3 down 4 to go. But I never use the 2A argument, I always say it's fun, its to protect my family and if someone says "why do yuou need guns" I come back with "why do you need that big house" or "why do you meec that BMW", etc... Its not about need, its about want.

[NYMetsFan86 9]

so many awesome personal experiences this thread is turning out to be way more informative then i ever thought possible. keep it rolling haha. its good to hear how other peoples families feel/react. great overall discussion. thanks 

[NYMetsFan86 9]

If someone is strongly anti-gun ownership you probably won't be able to change their mind.  90% of the issue is emotional/ethical/moral, not rational/logical.  Many people simplistically view the issue as:  guns are designed to kill, guns are bad, you don't need one.  My advice is not to discuss it with them, and if you do take a low-key approach.

 

Whatever you do, get as much training as you possibly can.  The best place to do that in NJ, IMO, is Gunforhire, but there are other places throughout the state.  Take basic pistol and then take as many intermediate and advanced classes as possible.  You will be safer and you'll enjoy shooting recreationally much more.

 

funny you mention it. i was just looking at Defensivesecurity.net  basic pistol class as it is only 40 mins from my house and I intend to get all the training i can. As i said previously my brother in law is an LEO and a firearms instructor so if he does NRA credentialed classes i'll obviously go that route. Either way i intend to get all the formal training i can readily afford. great point PDM thank you

[AlDente67 563]

funny you mention it. i was just looking at Defensivesecurity.net  basic pistol class as it is only 40 mins from my house and I intend to get all the training i can. As i said previously my brother in law is an LEO and a firearms instructor so if he does NRA credentialed classes i'll obviously go that route. Either way i intend to get all the formal training i can readily afford. great point PDM thank you

I know Mel and have bought several goodies from him.  Tell him Rick sent ya.

[mikeyboyeee 66]

wow Mikey, the thing that wowed me the most was your stepmothers comments. That would piss me off you handled it well. 

I handled it a bit worse then I alluded to in my post

[Old Glock guy 1,127]

I love when people find out and say, "Wait, you own A GUN?"  And I grudgingly admit, "Yes, I own A GUN," not mentioning what they would consider an arsenal.

 

Not much to add here.  Seems like we all have similar experiences with friends and family who dispprove.  The best advice you have been given is to avoid discussing it with people who are resistant, and if anyone shows some interest, take them shooting (if you can find and afford the ammo).  As we all have found, once that happens, they will likely be won over.

[scorched 0]

My father is semi anti-2A. At least my mom (they are divorced) is pro 2A, she has her fid and a 9mm ruger. I just try and not bring it up to much around my pops.

[Underdog 1,593]

If a family-member doesn't like them, just avoid any talks, etc. around him or her. 

 

But, I was at a party and I was talking to my uncle about the crazy rash of attacks on the 2nd Amendment and my little brother, who hates guns, overheard me.  He told me to shut up, and that I was part of the problem.  I continued to talk with my uncle and I have purchased an NRA membership in his name as a gift.  I wonder which magazine he would like.  In his case, I hope they go into overtime with their junk mailings. 

[silverado427 10,680]

 No one in my family has ever owned a gun. I really don't care what anybody thinks , If they can't love me or respect my choices oh well. jmho.     

[71ragtopgoat 23]

It gets worse. I have a very liberal, quasi socialist GF who is also anti gun, BUT grew up in a VERY pro Gun family (her cousins would exchange guns and weapons for xmas every year) and her dad is extremely pro 2a and has MANY!

 

Sounds just like my now ex wife. LOL Be careful and get a pre nup if it does go to that level. NJ has even crazyer divorce laws then it does gun laws.

[Socom 19]

I was raised on guns kinda glad my family are not antis!! But on a good note at least your stepping forward in your life and by joining the crowd

[Geek 4]

My wife was anti-gun, so I bought a very heavy safe before acquiring any guns.  She gradually got used to the idea.  Then I brought home a Mosin and explained that I was an antique.  To my surprise she decided it looked cool and wanted to hang it on the wall.  She still has no interest in shooting, but she has no further objection to my interest.

[BlueLineFish 615]

as my wife told a buddy at a bbq the other day. He gets guns and he buys me loius vuitton bags so it evens out. Its all about checks and balances....lol

[sof 0]

As you can see you've gotten some good advice on how to handle your families issues with guns. My 2 cents: educate yourself on the 2nd amendment issues thoroughly and on the numerous errors in the assumptions of the antis so you are well versed in both sides of the issue. Organize your thoughts and feelings on why you are a shooter and what you like about it. Then, when/if the question comes up you are prepared to give them intelligent, well spoken viewpoints with no hesitation or anger. Finally, remember that for them, you can be a positive example of what gun owners really are, so that if they do open their minds to your point of view, you help them realize we are not the threat they fear and are normal law abiding citizens just like them.

That, I fear, is the only way we win this battle in the long run.

[SgtToadette 59]

I'm in a similar situation. I'm coming up on my 1-year anniversary of being a gun owner and things are pretty good.

 

I come from a liberal family. I spent every night in high school watching Countdown with Kieth Olbermann and The Rachel Maddow Show (they still have a special place in my heart despite their obvious bias). I've never been to a Church service and my parents were afraid to let me play Pokemon. My mom is an activist vegetarian (as am I, minus the activist) and pseudo-pacifist. There are several Buddhist figures throughout my house.

 

I knew just going up to my mom and saying "Hey, I want to get a gun" wasn't going to cut it. What I ended up doing was writing a concise paper expressing my thoughts. Yeah it's a bit corny, but by my judgement, it was the best medium I had to convey what I wanted to convey without being interrupted or shot down immediately. Clearly it worked, and while my mom isn't looking to go out and get her FPID, she's tolerant of my ownership. At her request, I don't keep any firearms loaded (though I do keep several mags loaded in very close proximity). She also requested that I take a safety class, which is really something every prospective gun owner should do.

 

The approach that worked best for me was trying to normalize the activity and ask for tolerance. I've stated before that liberal-minded people tend to think of themselves as especially tolerant and open-minded. If you assert that they aren't one of those things, they tend to back-pedal immediately. I explained a lot of the misconceptions and even mentioned the forum here, making sure she understood that I'm looking to become part of a community of people and that I'm taking it seriously.

 

I also don't think mentioning it nonchalantly is a good idea. The concept and practice of gun ownership is very serious, and especially serious to those who are anti-gun. Make sure you're treating the idea with the level of respect and seriousness it deserves.

 

There is certainly a right and a wrong way to talk about guns with anti-gun people. Having been largely anti-gun myself for much of my life, I can attest to that. Be calm, have your facts in order, and encourage conversation. Explore their aversion to ownership and if you must agree to disagree, simply ask for their tolerance and respect. It's what worked for me.

[NYMetsFan86 9]

sof and toadette, Thanks very much, i'll certainly heed your advice as I do look forward to further educating myself 2a and especially safety

[Johnny 0]

I'm in a similar situation. I'm coming up on my 1-year anniversary of being a gun owner and things are pretty good.

 

I come from a liberal family. I spent every night in high school watching Countdown with Kieth Olbermann and The Rachel Maddow Show (they still have a special place in my heart despite their obvious bias). I've never been to a Church service and my parents were afraid to let me play Pokemon. My mom is an activist vegetarian (as am I, minus the activist) and pseudo-pacifist. There are several Buddhist figures throughout my house.

 

You may want to mention this quote from Dalai Lama to her "If someone has a gun and is trying to kill you, it is reasonable to shoot back with your own gun. Not at the head, where a fatal wound might result. But at some other body part, such as a leg."  The bolded part is often left out but it does not need to be. He clearly feels that it is ok for someone to own a gun. Although his ideas of how to use it may not be agreed with, he says "your own gun".

[SgtToadette 59]

You may want to mention this quote from Dalai Lama to her "If someone has a gun and is trying to kill you, it is reasonable to shoot back with your own gun. Not at the head, where a fatal wound might result. But at some other body part, such as a leg."  The bolded part is often left out but it does not need to be. He clearly feels that it is ok for someone to own a gun. Although his ideas of how to use it may not be agreed with, he says "your own gun".

 

The statues aren't there because they hold any specific religious value, but rather because they represent peace and tranquility inherent in Buddhist thought. It's largely intended at a pacifistic idol. I've heard that quote before, and it's great to have, but it's not really relevant to my situation.

 

I do appreciate your concern, though. 

[NYMetsFan86 9]

do you assume im not a man....,.....do you assume i am not a hard worker..........do you assume i have no mortgage...........do you assume im not married or engaged........

 

Dosen't seem like a great assumption.  I need no validation but thanks for bashing........very enjoyable to read all these awesome posts though

[T Bill 649]

Another member has posted a reference to an article in the forum that I feel is relavent to your situation.

http://www.iowastatedaily.com/opinion/article_1c144792-b36d-11e2-8ac6-001a4bcf887a.html?TNNoMobile

 

 

Print it out and read it.   Let them read it.

 

Curious to hear their response.

 

Of course it means a "family debate"  is possible.  But, just see how open a mind they really have.

[NYMetsFan86 9]

Bill, thanks for the link