Jump to content
Maksim

Daily humor thread

Recommended Posts

9 hours ago, PeteF said:

Why don't you post your tax returns?  Why don't you post your grades? 
Oh thats right its nobody's business but your's,  but you think you have a right to see someone else's?How's about you post Odumbo's grades?  Maybe his birth certificate?  (that one being an actual requirement of the office)Oh and as to the report,  Do you understand what  "classified" means? And that releasing grand jury material is illegal?
Really seek professional help for you TDS.

@PeteF:

We are all entitled to the privacy of our high school and college transcripts that reveal what grades we received.  One’s school records are supposed to be private and for any institution of higher learning to release them without the student’s permission would be an invasion of their privacy and against the law.  The mere fact that Trump has gone to such great lengths to hide them should be all that anyone needs to know. 

I also find it to be incredibly hypocritical that Trump demanded to see President Obama's college and graduate school transcripts, yet refuses to release his own.  One has to wonder what he's hiding….?  We do know that Trump never even made the dean's list, despite his claims to the contrary.  The fact that Donald Trump won't read briefing papers any longer than one page, with bullet points and graphics, is pretty good evidence that he would not have done the work necessary to make good grades in high school or college or graduate school.  Trump is such an obvious egomaniac that if the records were just above average, let alone very good, then he would have them framed in the Oval Office, along with all of the photos of himself on various magazine covers.  Clearly, their absence speaks volumes….

We see the same panic by Trump about his tax returns and why he has and is going to such great lengths to not release them voluntarily, or ultimately to be forced to release them by Congress.

Yet you, like so many of Trump’s fan-boys, who do not care about his most obvious lies, could not care less about him lying about being a top student. Nobody, except his most devoted acolytes, believes that Trump is a "stable genius", so there isn't much point in disproving it. But it is pretty amusing that a guy who was so obsessed with knowing President Obama's grades is so paranoid that the public might learn what his were.

A fellow student from Wharton has stated that Trump was a lazy, middling student who did the bare minimum to just scrape by.  He was not then, nor is he now, intellectually curious.  Trump demonstrates to the American public every day with his lack of intellectual curiosity just how low his mental capabilities are.   We can, as citizens, grade him on his abilities as a President, Commander in Chief, and human being.  We will have a chance to record those grades officially in November 2020.

AVB-AMG

3 hours ago, fishnut said:

@AVB-AMG this is the daily humor thread not the butt hurt because trump is still your president and is making America great again thread 

@fishnut:

What's the matter...... you and some others here don't realize that humor is a two-way street....?
Time for you to grow up and learn to take a joke....

AVB-AMG

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 hours ago, fishnut said:

@AVB-AMG this is the daily humor thread not the butt hurt because trump is still your president and is making America great again thread 

 

honestly, this is supposed to be the daily humor thread, not the politics thread but that ship sailed a long time ago sadly.

  • Agree 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
17 hours ago, AVB-AMG said:

Tds lunatic bullshit

 

 

So you admit you have no right to see his transcripts or tax return, but want to, just to see what he is hiding?  

Once again post your tax returns and transcripts,  we want to know what you are hiding.   While you are at it why not let everyone go thru your house and belongings, after all if you have nothing to hide.  Mighty hypocritical of you.

I guess you work in some delusional job where CEOs have time to read the details on everything that goes on.  Believe it or not,  that is what the CEOs need.  Day to day details need to be handled at a lower level.  Or do you really think someone can read 1000's of pages of reports daily?

So your ASSumtions about Trumps time in college is based on "a student's" recollections.  Nice deductive reasoning Sherlock.  But then again you think a couple of years in school, no matter what the result is more important than 60 years of real world experience.  

Once again, seek professional help.   Your TDS is accelerating.  

Oh and by the way, posting non funny cartoons drawn by fellow TDS suffers is not humorous.  You want to create a "I'm butt hurt because the drunken criminal lost" thread feel free.

 

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
9 hours ago, AVB-AMG said:

 

 

@fishnut:

What's the matter...... you and some others here don't realize that humor is a two-way street....?
Time for you to grow up and learn to take a joke....

AVB-AMG

No, it really isent. Would you post black jokes on a predomitly black forum? Would you tell gay jokes on a LGBTQ forum? How about you step off your high horse and stop looking down on people as you do so often. Trump is your president get over it just like the vast majority of us did when Obama got elected.

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I obviously love racing and riding and as someone that has had the cops try to steal my bikes I find this video incredibly satisfying. 

 

SLAM! FUCK THAT GUY! 

  • Like 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Even a turd can't ruin this thread....some gold right here.

 

A teacher asked her class how many of them were  Bernie Sanders fans.

Not really knowing what a Bernie Sanders fan is, but wanting to be liked by the teacher, all the kids raised their hands except for Little Johnny.

The teacher asked Little Johnny why he has decided to be different...again.

Little Johnny said, 'Because I'm not a Bernie Sanders fan.'

The teacher asked, 'Why aren't you a Bernie Sanders fan?'

Johnny said, 'Because I'm a Conservative.'

The teacher asked him why he's a Conservative.
Little Johnny answered, 'Well, my Mom's a Conservative and my Dad's a Conservative, so I'm a Conservative.'

Annoyed by this answer, the teacher asked, 'If your Mom was a Moron and your Dad was an idiot, what would that make you?'

Little Johnny replied, 'A  Bernie Sanders fan.' 

  • Like 1
  • Agree 1
  • Haha 3

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Letter to My Boss:


I have enjoyed working here these past several years. You have paid me very well and given me benefits beyond belief. Have 3-4 months off per year and a pension plan that will pay my salary till the day I die and then pay my estate one year salary death bonus and then continue to pay my spouse my salary with increases until she or he dies and a health plan that most people can only dream of having .
 
Despite this, I plan to take the next 12-18 months to seek a new position. During this time I will show up for work when it is convenient for me. In addition, I fully expect to draw my full salary and all the other perks associated with my current job.
 
Oh yes, if my search for this new job proves fruitless, I will be coming back with no loss in pay or status. Before you say anything, remember that you have no choice in this matter. I can, and I will do this.
 
Sincerely,
 
Every Senator or Congressman running for President
 
 
Come to think of it, that's not really that funny. 

  • Like 2

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Due to the popularity of the "Survivor" shows, Texas is planning to do one entitled: "Survivor - Texas-Style!" 

The lucky contestants will all start in Dallas, drive to Waco, Austin, San Antonio, then over to Houston and down to Brownsville. They will then proceed up to Del Rio, El Paso, Odessa, Midland, Lubbock, and Amarillo.  From there they will go on to Abilene and Fort Worth, and finally , back to Dallas.

Each contestant will be driving a pink Prius with 15 bumper stickers which will read:


1.  "I'm A Democrat"
2.  "Amnesty For Illegals"
3.  "I Love RAP"
4.  "Boycott Beef"
5  "I Voted For Obama"
6.  "George Strait Sucks"
7.  "Elect Hillary In 2020"
8.  "Vote Eric Holder Texas Governor"
9.  "Rosie O'Donnell Is A great role model"
10.  "I Love Obama Care and Chuck Schumer"
11.  "Kaepernick Is My Hero"
12.  "I Side With Jane Fonda"
13.  "It's all Bush's Fault”

14.  "Islam Is A Peace-Loving Religion"

- and the last sticker is;

15.  "I'm Here To Confiscate Your Guns" 

The first contestant to make it back to Dallas alive wins.

  • Like 3
  • Haha 1

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.



  • olight.jpg

    Use Promo Code "NJGF10" for 10% Off Regular Items

  • Supporting Vendors

  • Latest Topics

  • Similar Content

    • By njJoniGuy
      Longtime resident Lady Liberty, age 236 was struck by a stolen Chevy Volt last night along the interstate. The driver and passengers, illegally in the US from their native countries across the world, then dragged Ms. Liberty into the woods and brutally sodomized her before heading to the local polling place where they registered using the names of Supreme Court justices and voted without being challenged by UN poll watchers.
       
      Authorities found them around the corner, each with a large supply of newly legalized recreational marijuana, getting high. They were taken into custody and released a short time later with a kiss on each cheek and a prepaid gift card for WaWa to handle the munchies.
       
      Ms. Liberty is in extremely critical condition in the Intensive Care Unit, and doctors are very wary of her chances of recovery. A crowd of zombie-like citizens are already gathered at the Liberty residence, preparing to loot it of valuables when she succumbs to her injuries or the Death Panel declares her worthless and pulls the plug.
    • By DBCooper
      These guys know how to party...
       
      http://www.liveleak....=3c6_1347955567
    • By Maksim
      Why not an offshoot...
       
      Been meaning to start thread a few days ago, after dry firing, I was trying to copy a link from youtube to chat....
       
       
      You know you play too many gun games (uspsa/idpa) when you...
      ...double tap the Control + C twice before pasting the link.
    • By njJoniGuy
      Cross posted from the nationalmatch site
      Enjoy!
       
    • By njJoniGuy
      http://www.strategyp...01123142956.asp
       
      with link to their overall humor section
      such as:
       
      and
       
       
      Enjoy!
  • Posts

    • I very seriously doubt this has anything to do with terrorism.    1) Harbor pilots are VERY seriously vetted, and highly trained. Not to mention extremely well paid. My experience knowing a few of them, and knowing how they are recruited and screened tells me that there is a slim to highly unlikely chance that a harbor pilot would have participated in anything like that.    2) Maintenance of foreign flag ships is well known to be dubious. Especially these days. These were NOT US flag, Jones act sailors. It was (to my understanding) a largely Indian crew on that ship, with a Ukrainian Captain. Indian crews are not exactly known for being stellar.    3) The bunkers (fuel) these ships use is ‘Bunker C’, which is a heavy, dirty fuel oil that can, and usually is, pretty contaminated. This stuff ain’t your car grade gasoline or diesel fuel. It’s nasty.   It requires nearly constant filter changes and maintenance to the engine/generators. The ship took on fuel prior to departing port, which would stir up all kinds of shit in the fuel tanks, which would contribute to particulates in the fuel lines/filters.    4) I’d say the posting of the chief engineer for Maserek above was pretty spot on as far as chain of events.    This was a shitty accident, with horrible timing and outcome. Not a terror attack. 
    • I saw Lara's interview on Bannon's War Room, and that gave me pause for thought. Her conjecture depends primarily on the veracity of her sources. Regardless, if it's not applicable in any way to this ship disaster, the methods described seem valid to me. And worthy of consideration for the future. As I said before, IMO something is coming. Death by a thousand cuts? Lara Logan Provides Comprehensive Baltimore Update: Experts in Behavioral Analytics, Counter-Terrorism, and National Security Analyze Recent Incident | The Gateway Pundit | by Jim Hᴏft
    • Another big windfall for governments'. The 'winner'? Not so much. Mega Millions $1.13 billion winner is facing mega tax bill. The amount is staggering. - nj.com
×
×
  • Create New...