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Maksim

Daily humor thread

By Maksim, in General Discussion

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15636215    454

15636215
Posted
20 hours ago, Downtownv said:

 

That's why Michelle Obama doesn't run!

 

Screen Shot 2022-08-07 at 2.15.51 PM.png

They cannot expose  his history! Pregnant pics! Sorry, do not have, they went down with the ship we were on from kenya! No college transcripts either! They went down in the plane we were skydiving from! That is where barry's birth cert. went too. 50 years from now all will be exposed when nobody gives a shit! Like johnson had kennedy shot!

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Bklynracer    1,265

Bklynracer
Posted

Some of these are so true. 
 

1.. In my many years I have come to a conclusion that one useless man is a shame, two is a law firm and three or more is a congress.
-- John Adams
 
2.. If you don't read the newspaper you are uninformed, if you do read the newspaper you are misinformed.
-- Mark Twain

 3.. Suppose you were an idiot. And suppose you were a member of Congress. But then I repeat myself..
Mark Twain
 
4. I contend that for a nation to try to tax itself into prosperity is like a man standing in a
bucket and trying to lift himself up by the handle.
-- Winston Churchill
 
5. A government which robs Peter to pay Paul can always depend on the support of Paul.
-- George Bernard Shaw
 
6.. A liberal is someone who feels a great debt to his fellow man, which debt he proposes to pay off with your money.
-- G. Gordon Liddy
 
7.. Democracy must be something more than two wolves and a sheep voting on what to have for dinner.
-- James Bovard, Civil Libertarian (1994)
 
8. Foreign aid might be defined as a transfer of money from poor people in rich countries to rich people in poor
countries.
-- Douglas Casey, Classmate of Bill Clinton at Georgetown University

 9. Giving money and power to government is like giving whiskey and car keys to teenage boys.
-- P. J. O'Rourke, Civil Libertarian
 
10. Government is the great fiction, through which everybody endeavors to live at the expense of everybody else.
-- Frederic Bastiat, French Economist (1801-1850)
 
11. Government's view of the economy could be summed up in a few short phrases: If it moves, tax it. If it 
keeps moving, regulate it. And if it stops moving, subsidize it.
-- Ronald Reagan (1986)

 12. I don't make jokes. I just watch thegovernment and report the facts.
-- Will Rogers
 
13. If you think health care is expensive now, wait \until you see what it costs when it's free!
-- P. J. O'Rourke
 
14. In general, the art of government consists of taking as much money as possible from one party of 
the citizens to give tothe other.
-- Voltaire (1764)
 
15. Just because you do not take an interest in politics doesn't mean politics won't take an interest in you!
-- Pericles (430
      B. C.)
 
16. No man's life, liberty, or property is safe while the legislature is in session.
-- Mark Twain (1866)
 
17. Talk is cheap... except when Congress does it.
Anonymous
 
18. The inherent vice of capitalism is the unequal sharing of the blessings. The inherent blessing of 
socialism is the equal sharing of misery.
-- Winston Churchill
 
19. The only difference between a tax man and a taxidermist is that the taxidermist leaves the skin.
-- Mark Twain
 
20. The ultimate result of shielding men from the effects of folly is to fill the world with fools.
-- Herbert Spencer, English Philosopher (1820-1903)
 
21. There is no distinctly native American criminal class...save Congress.
-- Mark Twain
 
22. What this country needs are more unemployed politicians.
-- Edward Langley, Artist (1928-1995)
 
23. A government big enough to give you everything you want, is strong enough to take everything you have.
-- Thomas Jefferson
 

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Bklynracer    1,265

Bklynracer
Posted

On their honeymoon the new bride asked the new groom how many women he had slept with?

He said if I told you it would cause you to freak out.

She says, no I won`t.

He says OK, one, two, three, four, five, six, seven, you, nine, ten, eleven, twelve ...

 
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