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Maksim

Daily humor thread

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New Jersey State Police have announced the discovery of an arms cache of 200 semi-automatic rifles

with 250,000 rounds of ammunition, 10 anti-tank missiles,

4 grenade launchers, 2 tons of heroin,
...
$25 million in forged bills and a ring of 25 prostitutes

all in a housing project

behind the Camden Public Library.

Camden residents were stunned.
A community spokesman said:
"We're shocked. We never even knew we had a library!!"

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A U.S. Marine Colonel was about to start the morning briefing to his staff.
While waiting for the coffee machine to finish brewing he decided to pose
a question to all assembled. He explained that his wife had been a bit frisky
the night before and he failed to get his usual amount of sound sleep. He
posed the question: how much of sex is "work" and how much is pleasure?

A Major chimed in with 75%-25% in favor of work.
A Captain said it was 50%-50%.
A lieutenant responded with 25%-75% in favor of pleasure (depending on
his state of inebriation at the time)
Being there was no consensus, the colonel turned to the PFC who was in charge
of making their coffee and asked for HIS opinion.Without any hesitation, the young PFC responded, "Sir, it has to be 100%pleasure. The colonel was surprised at his certainty and as you might guess,
he asked why? "Well, sir, if there was any work involved, the officers would
have me doing it for them."

The room fell silent...

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Had a NY city detective played a copy of this in a shop i worked at in 1987.

 

He also showed us a photo album of battered children and women, some of the photo's he would not show us.. their are some screwed up people out their..

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Had a NY city detective played a copy of this in a shop i worked at in 1987.

 

An old acquaintance who knew a State Trooper played it for him back in 87 or 88 clearly before the online surge so it must have been on tape. Anyway fast forward to *about* 2005 for me and I heard it played for the first time on a Philly radio station (without the F-Bombs). I always wanted to hear it so I found and downloaded the wav file several years ago. Long story I was moving some files around on the computer last night and rediscovered it so I figured I share with the group via that URL w/transcript, obviously It all over the internet now....

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