dobie 0 Posted April 22, 2015 1.Law of Mechanical Repair - After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch and you'll have to pee. 2.Law of Gravity - Any tool, nut, bolt, screw, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible place in the universe. 3.Law of Probability - The probability of being watched is directly proportional to the stupidity of your act. 4.Law of Random Numbers - If you dial a wrong number, you never get a busy signal; someone always answers. 5.Variation Law - If you change lines (or traffic lanes), the one you were in will always move faster than the one you are in now. 6.Law of the Bath - When the body is fully immersed in water, the telephone will ring. 7.Law of Close Encounters - The probability of meeting someone you know INCREASES dramatically when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with. 8.Law of the Result - When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, IT WILL!!! 9.Law of Biomechanics - The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach. 10.Law of the Theater & Hockey Arena - At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle, always arrive last. They are the ones who will leave their seats several times to go for food, beer, or the toilet and who leave early before the end of the performance or the game is over. The folks in the aisle seats come early, never move once, have long gangly legs or big bellies and stay to the bitter end of the performance. The aisle people also are very surly folk. 11.The Coffee Law - As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold. 12.Murphy's Law of Lockers - If there are only 2 people in a locker room, they will have adjacent lockers. 13.Law of Physical Surfaces - The chances of an open-faced jelly sandwich landing face down on a floor are directly correlated to the newness and cost of the carpet or rug. 14.Law of Logical Argument - Anything is possible IF you don't know what you are talking about. 15. Law of Physical Appearance - If the clothes fit, they're ugly. 16.Law of Public Speaking -- A CLOSED MOUTH GATHERS NO FEET! 17.Law of Commercial Marketing Strategy - As soon as you find a product that you really like, they will stop making it OR the store will stop selling it! 18.Doctors' Law - If you don't feel well, make an appointment to go to the doctor, by the time you get there, you'll feel better. But don't make an appointment and you'll stay sick. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
djg0770 481 Posted April 22, 2015 The law of springs - The smaller the spring, the more pressure it will be under and the harder to catch it will be. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
1LtCAP 4,259 Posted April 22, 2015 the law of liquids. if you drop a tool, and it is at all possible, it will land in a bucket of coolant or oil. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
T Bill 649 Posted April 22, 2015 90% of anything is crud. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
msokad 3 Posted April 22, 2015 Still laughing....these were good. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Grapeshot 301 Posted April 23, 2015 90% of anything is crud.82.5 % of statistics are made up Sent from my KFOT using Tapatalk Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
siderman 1,134 Posted April 23, 2015 the law of truck mounted tool boxes- always go to the other side first because that tool you want is always on the other side. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheLugNutZ 21 Posted April 23, 2015 The law of rotary and cutting tools: Bits/cutting wheels will break/fly off never to be found. So have a bunch!! (Dremel for example) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Njbanshee 9 Posted April 23, 2015 Funny stuff Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheLugNutZ 21 Posted April 24, 2015 Oh and in my example, make sure you are the only one in the garage/workshop. This happened last week, thank god my daughter went inside b/c I had a bit fly off the dremel after it got stuck and the tq made it pop out and it literally shot across the garage! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
koontz946 0 Posted April 25, 2015 #2 for sure... Working in the elevator industry, I always have guys trying to work above me. They say "oh I won't drop anything" or "I'll be careful" No. Anything you drop will find the tiniest of holes and go right down the elevator shaft with no obstructions. It's funny how people react when you run at them with a spud wrench after what they carelessly dropped nearly killed you. /rant Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites