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Daily humor thread

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How to tell which type of Lab you have...

 

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  • Greenday sat down at the bar and told the bartender, 'I'll have three shots of whiskey, please." The bartender replied, "Three shots? Are you celebrating something?" "As a matter of fact, I

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Oh how I wish we had a fuk mi in my jurisdiction....

Oh how I wish we had a fuk mi in my jurisdiction....

 

The best is being dispatched to dr. wycoffs (dispacthers purposely make it sound like whackoff) office

Just another day on the Jersey turnpike. lol

 

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A woman had just returned to her home from an evening of church services, when she was startled by an intruder. She caught the man in the act of robbing her home of its valuables and yelled: 'Stop! Acts 2:38!' (Repent and be Baptized, in the name of Jesus Christ, so that your sins may be forgiven.)

 

The burglar stopped in his tracks. The woman calmly called the police and explained what she had done.

 

As the officer cuffed the man to take him in, he asked the burglar: 'Why did you just stand there? All the old lady did was yell a scripture to you' 'Scripture?' replied the burglar. 'She said she had an Ax and Two 38s!'

The best is being dispatched to dr. wycoffs (dispacthers purposely make it sound like whackoff) office

 

Nothing beats listening to dispatchers try to hold their composure for penile bleeds Worst is when they successfully make it the first time but the repeat gets them every time :)

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What, you can't 1-hand it? :D

 

 

 

 

The clip's in the front anyway...

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