Handyman

Damn! Did you find it next to your Old Spice?

Where's the Zeeker? Did Mrs. Zeke find this thread and cut off his internet privileges?

They are really bad this year. I saturate my shoes/socks or pants below the knees with either Cutter or Deep Woods Off. If you have a yard area where your dog hangs out, blast it with Bug B Gone before the next rain.

This happened to my wife’s car once. Right after I took out a big life insurance policy on her.

Good thinking. I’m glad I left out the “drown him in a sack idea.” Oops....

Near daily? I hope you have a good cardiologist...

Catch him in a Have a Heart trap, spray paint him purple, and send him on his way.

You meed a little electric fence for a few weeks. Let him do a whizz on that.

That’s what my neighbor would have thought, too. God rest his soul. He caught something called “multiple myeloma” out of the blue. No risk factors. I never ate his marinara sauce - it always had this weird chemical aftertaste.

Hey, if Mother Nature wants to blow trees over on my house, she is asking for it. All that oil came out of a hole in the ground somewhere. Send it back home. Now you’ll make me feel bad about all the turpentine I used to dump over the fence into my neighbors raised bed garden.

Every time I feel a tree hugging coming on, I pour some used motor oil down the storm drain out front. Instant cure!

No sense cutting the grass until it is flopping over from its own weight. I always hoped if I let it get tall enough seed heads would develop and it could propagate itself.

This is what I was wondering - companies won't have a policy about moving a non-empty gun safe?

Hey all you fleeing people, how do you handle moving a full gunsafe and a sh!t ton of ammo? Will moving companies handle this stuff? I imagine you transport all the firearms in your personal vehicle?

That implies loyalty to either a company or the customers. Corporations no longer have either. They run a company into the ground, bail out, and make a seven figure salary elsewhere. Rinse and repeat.

Now you are talking! Beef? If it walks or flies they serve it. I think I once had a bald eagle in there.

Any ideas for a good starter .22 for a kid under 10? Cricket? Henry Mini-Bolt?

Don't we all?

Unless I'm seeding an area only the Lord in his providence waters the grass.

You guys all sound like AVB. I like to keep it simple:

The Bayer stuff in the blue bottle is ok. It kills dandelions in a couple days and it doesn't hurt the grass. You just have to pull the flowers off before you spray so they don't turn into seed heads. I killed all my poison ivy with that stuff, too.

Set the mower as high as it will go. Or maybe one click down...

Gangs? You mean like MS-13 that comes in with the illegal aliens? They make the Crips and Bloods look like amateurs.

Given the run around most police departments give you to just get an FID or purchase permit, one might reasonably expect this to be epic.

If they destroy them, you can be 100% sure no one is going to pay you anything.