Manifesto of a Bad American

[Bully 749]

I'm Your Worst Nightmare. I like big cars, big cigars and big breasts

without artificial ingredients. I believe the money I make belongs to me

and my family, not to some mid-level bureaucrat with a bad comb-over who

wants to give it away to crack addicts squirting out babies. I don't care

about appearing compassionate. I know that playing with guns doesn't make

you a killer. I b

elieve it's called the Boy Scouts for a reason. I don't think being a

minority makes you noble or victimized. I don't care if you call me a

racist, a homophobe or a misogynist. I am not tolerant of others just

because they are different. I don't celebrate Kwanzaa. I believe that if

you are selling me a Big Mac, you do it in English. I don't use the excuse

"it's for the children" as a shield for socialist opinions or actions. I

believe no one ever died because of something Ozzy Osbourne, Ice-T or

Marilyn Manson sang. I think that being a student doesn't give you any

more enlightenment than working at Blockbuster. I don't want to eat or

drink anything with the words light, lite or fat-free on the package. I

believe everyone has a right to pray to their own God or gods. My heroes

include Ronald Reagan, John Wayne, and whoever canceled "Dr. Quinn,

Medicine Woman." I know wrestling is fake, but I still think The Rock

could kick YOUR ass. I think global warming is junk science. I've never

owned or was a slave and I didn't wander forty years in the desert after

getting chased out of Egypt and I haven't burned any witches or been

persecuted by the Turks and NEITHER HAVE YOU, so SHUDDAP already. "Rocky

and Bullwinkle" still makes me laugh. I believe a self-righteous liberal

out to Save The Earth is more dangerous than a Play Station. I want to

know which church is it exactly where the "Reverend" Jessie Jackson

preaches. I think explosions are cool. I think cops should have Something

Better To Do than snatching Elian Gonzalez at gunpoint to ship him back to

a totalitarian dictatorship. I want somebody to explain to me exactly why

it's wrong to point out that when I watch a freeway chase, I know the

losers the police eventually pull out of the car are gonna be some

gang-banging homies or vatos. I believe that it doesn't take a village to

raise a child - it takes a parent. I think tattoos and piercings are fine

if you want them, but please don't pretend they are a political statement.

I like good friends, good liquor and a good bowel movement first thing in

the morning. I'll admit that the only movies that ever made me cry were

"Ole Yeller" and "The Sands of Iwo Jima". I didn't realize Dr. Seuss was a

genius until I had a kid. I will not conform nor compromise just to keep

from hurting somebody's feelings. Sometimes I throw my soft drink can in

the trash, even when the recycle bin is just a few more steps. I'm neither

angry nor disenfranchised, no matter how desperately the mainstream media

would like the world to believe otherwise. Yeah, I'm a Bad American.

 

 

A friend of mine wrote this about 10 years ago. It echoes a lot of how I personally feel. Not the deepest stuff in the world but pertinent nonetheless.

 

Christopher

[johnp 45]

+1

[djg0770 481]

Man if I posted that on facebook I might automatically have the great friend purge!!

[Bully 749]

Man if I posted that on facebook I might automatically have the great friend purge!!

 

You just gave me an idea...!

 

C

[fishnut 2,358]

+1000

[Bully 749]

Done.

 

Most of my facebook "friends" don't get it anyway.

 

C

[brocglock23 4]

+1 Not much I can disagree with on that. Shared on my FB

[heaterbob 53]

I like it

[Josh S 0]

I LOVE YOU!

[Bully 749]

I LOVE YOU!

 

Woo HOO!!!

 

C

[hd2000fxdl 422]

Great!!!

[JimmyAGR 54]

Nice I to will post this. Thank you!

[Ray Ray 3,566]

I wrote that, your welcome.

[NJKen 23]

Man if I posted that on facebook I might automatically have the great friend purge!!

Funny you should say that, I just did it. Ill let you know how it works out for me!

Ken

[djg0770 481]

Funny you should say that, I just did it. Ill let you know how it works out for me!

Ken

 

Let me know how it goes!

[Secret Squirrel 3]

I agree with about 95% of that. Good stuff.

[Bully 749]

I wrote that, your welcome.

 

Unfortunately, I am well acquainted with the author.

 

C

[Malsua 1,422]

Unfortunately, I am well acquainted with the author.

 

C

 

This has been an internet chain email that's been around for years. Dating to at least 2001. It's been attributed to George Carlin and others. Here's one version that goes back to January 31, 2001.

 

http://www.bobainswo..._republican.htm

[TheSmokingGun 0]

I don't want to eat or

drink anything with the words light, lite or fat-free on the package.

 

Hell yeah! Born to be WILD!

 

[phoenix_iii 0]

Meh.