Daily humor thread

[silverado427 10,824]

[Ray Ray 3,566]

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1915581/

[RubberBullets 65]

[Arbelest 29]

 

I got my Tax Return"Returned"! I was trying to get a jump on doing my taxes this year, but the IRS sent my Tax Return back!! I guess it was because of my response to the line, which said: "List All Dependents"... I replied 12 million illegal immigrants , 3 million crack heads , 42 million unemployable people on food stamps , 2 million people in over 243 prisons, and 535 fools in the U.S. House and Senate .

 

Apparently , this was NOT acceptable. So I sent it back with a question …

 

"Did I forget someone?"

[johnp 45]

 

 

 

 

same guy

[BlueLineFish 615]

 

Obviously lessons not learned from plaxico

[tony357 386]

 

Who the hell is ED NOLB ?

[silverado427 10,824]

[Krdshrk 3,878]

[Krdshrk 3,878]

[hd2000fxdl 422]

A Glass of Wine or Beer

 

To my friends who enjoy a glass of wine.

And those who don't and are alwaysseen with a bottle of water in their hand.

 

As BenFranklin said:

In wine there is wisdom,

In beer there is freedom,

In water there is bacteria.

 

In a number of carefully controlled trials,

Scientists have demonstrated that if we drink

1 litre of water each day,

At the end of the year we would have absorbed

More than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli, (E. Coli) - bacteria

Found in feces.

In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop.

 

However,

We do NOT run that risk when drinking wine & beer

(or rum, whiskey or other liquor)

Because alcohol has to go through a purification process

Of boiling, filtering and fermenting.

 

Remember:

Water = Poop,

Wine = Health

Therefore, it's better to drink wine or beer and talk stupid,

Than to drink water and be full of Shit ! ! !

 

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information:

I'm doing it as a public service

[Krdshrk 3,878]

[Duppie 73]

A Glass of Wine or Beer

 

To my friends who enjoy a glass of wine.

And those who don't and are alwaysseen with a bottle of water in their hand.

 

As BenFranklin said:

In wine there is wisdom,

In beer there is freedom,

In water there is bacteria.

 

In a number of carefully controlled trials,

Scientists have demonstrated that if we drink

1 litre of water each day,

At the end of the year we would have absorbed

More than 1 kilo of Escherichia coli, (E. Coli) - bacteria

Found in feces.

In other words, we are consuming 1 kilo of poop.

 

However,

We do NOT run that risk when drinking wine & beer

(or rum, whiskey or other liquor)

Because alcohol has to go through a purification process

Of boiling, filtering and fermenting.

 

Remember:

Water = Poop,

Wine = Health

Therefore, it's better to drink wine or beer and talk stupid,

Than to drink water and be full of Shit ! ! !

 

There is no need to thank me for this valuable information:

I'm doing it as a public service

I am reminded that beer basically was the savior of many a metropolis simply because water was so foul......

[johnp 45]

[Arbelest 29]

[RubberBullets 65]

[johnp 45]

[hd2000fxdl 422]

 

 

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[Arbelest 29]

[One_crazy_dude 1]

 

That was great mad me giggle for a bit

[hd2000fxdl 422]

Was told the picture's name is "Triplets"

 

 

 

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[ChrisJM981 924]

[ChrisJM981 924]

[johnp 45]

 

[Soju 153]

 

 

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

 

I actually got number 5 right and was wonder what so so bad about the word pulse. That is funny though.

[vjf915 456]

I actually got number 5 right and was wonder what so so bad about the word pulse. That is funny though.

 

[hd2000fxdl 422]

 

 

Lol,, that needs to be the video not the pic to get the full effect...

 

 

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[johnp 45]

[Redfish62 1]

[vjf915 456]

Lol,, that needs to be the video not the pic to get the full effect...

 

I just looked for the gif, and couldn't find one. BUT!! I think if you would recognize the gif, you would recognize the picture.