I embarrassed my wife tonight.

[MedicYeti 96]

We were at a fundraiser event in Cape May, in a bar/restaurant. She, our son and I are in the line for the buffet, there were 6-8 people behind us when this woman cut in line between us. I tried to shoulder myself past her without making a scene but that didn't work. My son was walking between us and moved past her to get to me - no mistaking we were together. When it became our turn at the table I said to her "your obviously in more of a hurry then us so please go!" (Wife says I had a lot of attitude in my inflection). This woman then gets defensive "Your making a big deal of this, I just want to get something to eat!" I countered with "I am making a big deal, you cut between my wife and I and in front of 10 other people. My 3 year old understands waiting in line, why don't you?!" With that she stormed off and my wife didn't talk to me for half the evening.

I don't have a problem saying things to people but maybe I'm too willing to say something. I'd think the wife would know this by now.

Would you call the lady out or just let her go, I'm curious what others think.

[Scott204 1]

You were a lot nicer than i would have been.

[BlueLineFish 615]

Absolutely called her out and embarrassed her right away. Some people think they are too important to follow common decency.

[silverado427 10,759]

I would have done the exact same thing.

[MikeK77 8]

I always call people out and make THEM look like the ass....you were too soft on her

[Ray Ray 3,566]

If I do recall, your a large man. So, maybe you scared her off or something?

[fatty 241]

Most people don't have that common decency anymore, unfortunately. My wife gets upset when I call people out like that too but its so hard not to.

 

It's funny because there are always people around that see it happen and just smile and nod at you.

[Soju 153]

I would have gone with a sarcastic backhanded comment/compliment that would likely have gone over her head. I need to be more direct with my insults sometimes.

[MedicYeti 96]

I would have gone with a sarcastic backhanded comment/compliment that would likely have gone over her head. I need to be more direct with my insults sometimes.

Maybe my wife would appreciate if I were less direct.

 

Ray: yes, 6'7" 385

[PK90 3,573]

Maybe the lady thought there wasn't going to be any food left unless she got there before you.

 

 

 

 

 

 

J/K

[Clintoon Eastwood 2]

I'm a certified smart ass graduated at the top of my class and I would have embarrassed that lady with no problem. The wife would been definitely be mad at me but I can handle her at another time.

 

SO Yes sir, you did what a normal GUY would do, some people don't show any respect for others anymore. Even when you open a door at a seven eleven or something, people don't even say THANK YOU, like its your f@ckin job to stand there and open dorrs for people?? WTF?

[dgstinner 11]

I would've done the same thing.

 

 

Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

[Underdog 1,593]

Playing devil's advocate... It's all good and all to call somebody out. But, maybe that person will take that negative energy with her and then be mean or abusive to her son or her dog, for example. And, although it may not be a dangerous scenario, you never know if you are messing with someone that is a little off-balance, on drugs, or possibly someone that has some kind of illness, or dangerous. Perhaps that person has just lost a loved one and is distracted. Or, perhaps she will drink to oblivion from you angering her/calling her out and then kill somebody in a drunk-driving felony when she leaves the restaurant.

 

Now, I am not making excuses for anyone being rude, etc., but YOU are responsible for YOUR actions and the outcome, and, although tempted in these situations, it is almost always better, in my opinion, to turn the other cheek... and to diffuse the situation. And. although it is hard to do it sometimes, if you must, it is probably better to make a point with a little humor, being subtle goes along way. Look at her and give her a little smile and while smiling, say something in a pleasant tone like, "You must be really hungry to cut in front of all of us. Please go ahead. Bon appetit." And, being the bigger person is probably a better way to represent yourself in front of your wife and child. And, you wouldn't have let that rude person damper your evening's festivities by souring things with your wife.

[GRIZ 3,369]

I would do the same thing in a similar situation. I've done it in lines at amusement parks (most common) and even did it outside the library after confiriming with the librarian the woman cut in front of my kids. One tactic I've used, say in an amusement park line, is to say loudly enough for maybe 10-20 people behind me to hear something like "even if I wanted to let you in front of me what do you think all those people behind me are going to say. If you get them all to agree to let you in front of them, I'll let you in front of me". You enlist everyones aid without them doing anything. One time I did this the linejumper looked at the line behind me and about 50 people pointed him to the end of the line.

 

The only person you embarrassed was the linejumper. Nothing smartass about what you did.

[Krdshrk 3,878]

[JrzyGuy30 0]

Well done. I would handled it the same way- except now I have a pregnant wife who suddenly has a much bigger mouth and temper/attitude than me... So it could have been very interesting if it was me and her there.

[9X19 125]

 

 

Well played Sir.

[diamondd817 828]

You were in the right.

[PeteF 1,044]

Its amazing what a lone person will put up with or ignore.

But do something that affects their children, watch out.

I think you may your point to the rude lady quite appropriately.

[Handyman 5,682]

It's a shame for a horse's ass to go through life possibly never realizing they are a horse's ass. You did her a service by alerting her.

[Soju 153]

 

Has anyone actually applied the crazy eyed look with fierce clap approach linejumpers before? I'd be interested in seeing how that plays out.

[RecessedFilter 222]

In my experience, women don't like to speak up or expect the man (you) to speak up. This happens quite frequently with my girlfriend and I, and she doesn't have to nudge me or do anything of the sort. I am always quick to defend myself/us.

 

I think you handled it well. You gave it to her but you weren't an obnoxious ahole that some might have been.

[GRIZ 3,369]

Playing devil's advocate... It's all good and all to call somebody out. But, maybe that person will take that negative energy with her and then be mean or abusive to her son or her dog, for example. And, although it may not be a dangerous scenario, you never know if you are messing with someone that is a little off-balance, on drugs, or possibly someone that has some kind of illness, or dangerous. Perhaps that person has just lost a loved one and is distracted. Or, perhaps she will drink to oblivion from you angering her/calling her out and then kill somebody in a drunk-driving felony when she leaves the restaurant.

 

Now, I am not making excuses for anyone being rude, etc., but YOU are responsible for YOUR actions and the outcome, and, although tempted in these situations, it is almost always better, in my opinion, to turn the other cheek... and to diffuse the situation. And. although it is hard to do it sometimes, if you must, it is probably better to make a point with a little humor, being subtle goes along way. Look at her and give her a little smile and while smiling, say something in a pleasant tone like, "You must be really hungry to cut in front of all of us. Please go ahead. Bon appetit." And, being the bigger person is probably a better way to represent yourself in front of your wife and child. And, you wouldn't have let that rude person damper your evening's festivities by souring things with your wife.

 

People who cut in lines do it because they have been doing it for some time and no one has confronted them.

 

Patriot you are correct, you are responsible for your actions. That's why calling someone out when they are doing something in blatant violation of what civilization has established as the norm. Should I feel responsible if after they beat their dog, kid, or run someone over? No I don't. If they do one of those things its time once again for them to be responsible for their actions. Using your logic Jodie Foster should feel responsible for Chapman killing John Lennon.

 

If I'm not sure where the end of the line is I ask. If I get on what I think is the end of the line and someone informs me it isn't , I thank them and go to the end. This is the way people are supposed to behave.

 

BTW what do you tell the people behind you when you let someone cut in front of you? What about the hunger of everyone behind you?

 

Yes there are many types of confrontations that are best avoided. What we have been discussing here is not one of them.

[ChrisJM981 924]

Good for you. Way to throw in that your 3 year old has better manners than her. I hold doors for people and give a loud YOU'RE WELCOME to people that don't give thanks. Patriot it's not his fault she's an ahole. Don't turn it around on him.

[Socom 19]

You were a lot nicer than i would have been.

no shit; I woulda been Italian loud

[Old School 611]

Depending if you are right or left handed this is the best way to handle this.

 

Facing the person step to their LEFT side. Take your RIGHT foot and place it behind their Right foot. With you RIGHT hand grab a hand full of hair, face or what have you. Drive the cut-in into the ground over your right leg.

 

You may go to jail but the cut in will not do it again even if they survive.

 

Now just joking.... Like Patriot I just let these AHoles slide.

[this_is_nascar 162]

We were at a fundraiser event in Cape May, in a bar/restaurant. She, our son and I are in the line for the buffet, there were 6-8 people behind us when this woman cut in line between us. I tried to shoulder myself past her without making a scene but that didn't work. My son was walking between us and moved past her to get to me - no mistaking we were together. When it became our turn at the table I said to her "your obviously in more of a hurry then us so please go!" (Wife says I had a lot of attitude in my inflection). This woman then gets defensive "Your making a big deal of this, I just want to get something to eat!" I countered with "I am making a big deal, you cut between my wife and I and in front of 10 other people. My 3 year old understands waiting in line, why don't you?!" With that she stormed off and my wife didn't talk to me for half the evening.

I don't have a problem saying things to people but maybe I'm too willing to say something. I'd think the wife would know this by now.

Would you call the lady out or just let her go, I'm curious what others think.

 

 

My wife lost count of the number of times I embarrased her similar to this many many years ago. At some point years ago, I go tired of getting sh*t-on and being the "nice-guy". Now, I speak my mind, just like you did here. People need to be called out for their rudeness, otherwise they feel it's acceptable and will continue down that path. Nowadays, many are fearful that speaking up cold cause them harm or worse, death.

[XDJohnTact 49]

Actually, my wife would have turned to me and said something like "Are you going to let her cut in front of you like that?" I think you handled the situation perfectly, cudos to you, sir!

[djg0770 481]

Actually, my wife would have turned to me and said something like "Are you going to let her cut in front of you like that?" I think you handled the situation perfectly, cudos to you, sir!

 

This.

[Underdog 1,593]

People who cut in lines do it because they have been doing it for some time and no one has confronted them.

 

Patriot you are correct, you are responsible for your actions. That's why calling someone out when they are doing something in blatant violation of what civilization has established as the norm. Should I feel responsible if after they beat their dog, kid, or run someone over? No I don't. If they do one of those things its time once again for them to be responsible for their actions. Using your logic Jodie Foster should feel responsible for Chapman killing John Lennon.

 

If I'm not sure where the end of the line is I ask. If I get on what I think is the end of the line and someone informs me it isn't , I thank them and go to the end. This is the way people are supposed to behave.

 

BTW what do you tell the people behind you when you let someone cut in front of you? What about the hunger of everyone behind you?

 

Yes there are many types of confrontations that are best avoided. What we have been discussing here is not one of them.

 

I am not saying that they are not fully responsible for their actions. A drunken accident or a kick to the dog would be solely that person's responsibility. I am just saying that the actions you take (whether you feel responsible or not), could result into some unintended consequences. Again, my suggestion would not be to let it slide, but remain in control of the situation, make your point and with a little humor attached, and then move on. Had that action been taken it would not have put a damper on the rest of OP's evening and it would have set an example for his son on how to handle rude people. Meeting rudeness with anger/rudeness back, etc. almost never wins out. All that he might have changed was the delivery of the way that he said it. If he had been as sweet as pie in his delivery, then his wife would not have been angry because she was embarrassed. That's all I am saying. Everyone is responsible for his or her actions. Besides, the OP's only mistake was eating a buffet. How he handled it was OK. It's just humor could have made the point equally as well and then diffused the situation.